voice Archives - SRD Editing Services

Posted on January 27, 2020October 26, 2023 by Cortni Merritt, M.A. — 1 Comment

Ad Copy & Poetry: Kissing Cousins

Depictions of billboards at a busy intersection to relate ad copy and poetry

In writing for businesses, I frequently hear marketing directors/executives/creative team leaders say something to the effect of “Make every word count. We want them to feel, not think. Lead their thoughts with your words.” This is at the heart of ad copy.

It’s poetry, commercialized. (Oh, and dumbed down to the LCD). People marketing to you expect to you read, feel, and react at about the level of a thirteen year old. Don’t think they respect your intelligence. They think the buyer is “smart” and “savvy”, not knowledgeable.

In my most humblest of opinions.

So, what can we learn here, about this crucial fact of both genres of perhaps the least-read words on the planet? (Think about it: lower but more dedicated readership numbers for poetry vs. a widespread yet fickle audience in advertising.)

“Impact” and “retention” are the names of the games in both.

Impact is Instant in both Ad Copy & Poetry

Whether it’s poetry or sales copy, you need to land with an immediate impact. No, not immediate. Instant. Where in a novel, a reader may give you a whole page to sufficiently hook them, and in a short story the reader might allow you at least a paragraph to breathe magic into words, readers of ad copy and poetry give you about three words.

Three. Friggin. Words.

In no time flat, you have to trigger the reader into some kind of reaction. Get them through to the end of the sentence. That’s your first goal.

All the advice you’ve heard about eliminating adverbs? Now is the time.

You will find a difference in the use of adjectives in poetry vs. ads though. In poetry, you want sensory images and specifics that come with detailed nouns. In ad copy, adjectives can be useful to trigger emotions. You want the reader to be able to picture the product in their hand and their life.

With that being said, some of the same rules apply. Alliteration. Cacophony. The old school literary devices that you “need to know“, all show up in poetry and ad copy.

Retention Depends on Goals

Consider your end goal when writing.

If you want readers to feel, perhaps reflect and think very deeply, then you’re writing poetry, and you probably can keep someone who reads the first line engaged enough to read the first stanza. From there, it’s up to you to keep them engaged in every line.

If you want the reader to feel something within three words and take action by the end of a single sentence, then you’re in ad-copy-land.

For either type of writing, thinking about the goal of your words will lead to retention of your readers. If your goal is to entertain and inspire, and you focus your words on that, not only can you engage the reader for the entire poem or advertisement, but you have a higher chance of grabbing their attention in future encounters.

Ad Copy & Poetry: Concise. Clear. Compelling.

It’s what both ad copy writing and poetry must be.

Need editing for poetry or ad copy?

Posted on January 13, 2020October 26, 2023 by Cortni Merritt, M.A. — 1 Comment

On Intransitive Emotions: Emotional Writing Practice

Pink blooming flowers on the branch of the bush. To express emotional writing and intransitive verbs.

Where Do Emotions Go?

Do feelings have direct objects? Many do. Most of the time.

We do not feel an emotion like love if it is not directed toward some thing or someone. We don’t usually feel anger without a source, a thing that is the reason for our anger. Whether or not anger and love are ultimately directed toward the correct thing is a separate issue. But overall, they are not objectless. Not without an objective.

But what about gratitude? Or loneliness? Or freedom? Or even anxiety?

Some human emotions, like some verbs in the English language, may not need to act upon a direct object. Some things we, as humans, simply feel without it being directed toward a specific thing. Regardless of who caused the emotion or where it came from. Or what we plan to do with it.

I have heard it said that grief is love with nowhere to go. How beautifully tragic. You have so much love, but no object to direct it toward. You’ve lost someone or something you love, and what’s left is this love with no object to love. So it is transformed into grief. And then what do you do with it?

If you can learn to harness and develop your most emotional writing, you may be able to direct these emotions and express their universality to others.

Emotional Writing Is about Range

Consider: It is easy to write about emotions that come from an obvious person or can be directed easily outward or inward toward some manifestation. It is easy to show through emotional writing that a character is angry based on his or her reaction to the circumstances.

But your writing can grow from learning to express the intransitive actions and feelings of life. The things we all simply feel. The things we can’t necessarily explain or simply express.

Consider the sentence: He ran.

The verb does not need to act on anything. It stands alone. No object. This is what makes it an intransitive verb.

What emotions might your character have that run by themselves? What emotional state does your character default to? What might be some of the intransitive emotions that your character feels but which don’t have an object?

How can you express something like a character’s gratitude for the wind on her face with emotional writing? Is the character grateful to someone or something for the wind, or does she simply feel the gratitude without having anywhere to put it?

Does your character’s emotion need an object? It can have one, sure, but it may not be necessary. Just like he can run quickly. Or he can run on the pavement, your character can be grateful to someone or something. Even if it’s ineffable.

And if you, dear writer, can make your characters’ actions and intransitive emotions tangible, you will lead readers into a much richer world through the emotional writing that draws readers in and makes characters come to life.

This may be something to incorporate into your own self-editing and revision, as well as an item to address with your creative editor to ensure you’re working together to make your emotional writing as creative and expressive as possible.

Ready to talk with an editor about your emotional writing?

Posted on November 11, 2019October 26, 2023 by Cortni Merritt, M.A. — Leave a comment

Write like the Greats: Charles Bukowski

“Understand me.
I’m not like an ordinary world.
I have my madness,
I live in another dimension
and I do not have time for things
that have no soul.”

Writing like Bukowski

I don’t know much about Charles Bukowski. I know his reputation of being a … less-than-pleasant person. As Modest Mouse said, “God, who’d want to be such an asshole?“

But I know poetry (like ee cummings). I know good writing. Every now and then, I stumble across some writing from Bukowski, and it slaps me across the face.

Bukowski’s writing is raw.

His style is known for being no-frills. Bare-bones. And somehow, as in this example, there is strength in his vulnerability. There is grit ground into his wounds that seem to have scarred over, but he has never forgotten.

There is anger in these words. But is there not determination? And hope? And a promise for tomorrow?

The Beginnings

Look at how he begins each line of this poem — as a bold statement about himself. A declaration of truth.

First, he demands of the reader what they will do. An unapologetic demand that the reader do better, try something different — understanding. Then, he explains what he is (and is not) in a single line, and continues to tell the reader what he has and how he lives.

All these truths command the reader to follow his initial demand. You will understand the straightforwardness of his words, if nothing else. If you understand nothing of what he says, you know by the end what he thinks of you.

The Last Word

Then, look at the last word of each line. Each thought ends on a noun. A thing. Something real that you can sink your teeth into. Each of these — me, world, madness, dimension, things — evokes an image. Evokes a texture, sound, or feeling. You can picture them in your mind, you could describe them to someone else if you needed to.

And here is where Bukowski’s vulnerability comes to its head: he needs you to understand him. He needs you to hear what he has to say. Dismiss it when you’ve reached the end, if you want, but for a few sentences, he has made you do something different. He has made you think not only about him and what he is, but perhaps he has made you think about what and who you are as well.

As tough as he may have appeared, Bukowski needed this connection. With you. He needed you to understand for a moment. And he does not ask this of you — he demands it.

Bukowski Poetry Tip of the Day:

The heart of your poem (or even, your fiction) is what you’re demanding from your reader. Do not ask them for their attention — command it. Do not ask them to let you show your vulnerability, slice your heart open on the page and make it so they can’t look away.

Because that is the soul of this poem, isn’t it? We all need to be understood. We all am things, have things, and live … but Bukowski reminds us that we do not have time.

Want to talk about your poetry?

Posted on July 1, 2019October 26, 2023 by Cortni Merritt, M.A. — 2 Comments

On the Bechdel Test: Writing Tip for Gender

Bechdel test -- women and gender in fiction

As the origin story for the Bechdel Test goes, a political cartoon from the 1970s depicted two women discussing a movie they had seen. One says to the other that there are three things she looks for in a movie in order to qualify it as a “good” movie:

1. There have to be at least two women in it.
2. They have to talk to each other.
3. About something other than a man.

This continues to stand true. It is now a common litmus test for the issue of gender equality representation in film, commonly known as the Bechdel Test.

In general, ladies, we are taught to converse about many things, especially things which relate to men and having relationships with them. As a woman, I’ve noticed this more and more. I’ve kept track of how women relate to one another and the topics they choose to discuss around the lunch table, the water cooler, and the backyard, as it were.

To See A Difference, Do Differently

When I write, I think specifically about the world that I am building for my characters. Who do they interact with? Who do they relate to? What supporting characters populate and color their world? And, more importantly, who do they speak to and what do they speak about?

When writing, you must give yourself constant mini-Bechdel test checkups, to ensure you’re considering the realistic relationship between characters. Recently, while working on writing a developing relationship between two co-lead female characters, I sat and made a list of what defines their friendship.

How long have they known each other? What bonding experiences did they have that drove them together? How do they each see the other? And, perhaps most importantly, what do they talk about?

I wrote out a list of conversation topics — things they had in common or disagree about and keep circling back around to — things that didn’t include men or relationships with them.

For example, one of the characters owns a successful family business, while the other is trying to learn how to launch her own business, so they are able to often talk about business strategies and nuances of their industry.

They are both interested in natural healing and non-chemical cures for ailments, so they discuss plants, herbs, flowers, and they mix ingredients together to create their own formulas, like amateur apothecaries.

They are both interested in the history of the area where they live, and so they are able to talk about and visit together, places of historical interest. Of course, they gossip about the latest news from the British Royals, and they gush over clothing and lipstick colors on each other as they hang out and try them on, but it’s important to me to make sure that their relationship is real, dimensional, and about more than just tragedies in their lives, men, and tragedies that involve men.

What might your characters bond over? Keep your ideas in a scrap heap until you’re building specific people in a specific world.

Focus on Female Characters' Interests

Every (significant) character should have hobbies and interests that make them a believable, well-rounded person. And this might be doubly-true for female characters; traditionally, they are not expected to be much more than props in literature, and although a century of work against that means that the greatest novels include rich, lively female characters, there is still work to be done to ensure that future generations of female readers see women they admire talking about things they’ve never considered before.

Ideas. Perspectives. Personality. If a young female reader is first introduced to the concept of astronauts through female characters, imagine how that might teach her that women are more than pretty — they are the next generation of leaders.

Consider: How do clothes affect your characters? What is important about what they wear?

Reverse Bechdel Test

Less commonly discussed is something I like to call the “reverse Bechdel” test. Just like you want to have a fleshed-out cast of female characters who bring their own knowledge and non-male-oriented agendas to the table, you also want to have well-rounded male characters who are more than women-hating or women-obsessed.

I encourage you to apply a Reverse Bechdel test to a scene where you have two or more men talking — if they’re talking about women, is it in gender stereotypical way? Push yourself to examine your male-to-male conversations and how they talk about the opposite gender.

Writing Tip of the Day: Write Single-Gender Conversations for Bechdel Test Mastery

As a writing exercise, write a scene where a group of male characters are sitting around a male-comfortable space (like a barber shop, bar, street corner, etc.), talking over a subject. In particular, don’t have any of them bring up women, at all. Nobody comments on a woman’s appearance, no one complains about their relationship, nobody talks about anything sexual.

It might be easy, it might be hard — depending on the story you’re telling. But make sure that at some point, if you want to show strong male characters who are not simple tools of their hormones, show an intelligent conversation between men about a topic that is non-women related.

Additionally, write a scene in which a group of men is discussing women, and make it as honest as you can. To prevent the men from becoming blurred together and indistinguishable, develop their personalities by the ways they talk about women. What women are they talking about? Why? And how?

If you can show the men’s true characters in four or fewer statements about women, the reader will truly feel like they know and understand those characters in any other scenes in which they appear.

Then, challenge yourself to write similar scenes but using only female characters. This exercise may not be a traditional use or understanding of the Bechdel test, but practicing gendered perspectives will develop your overall skills as a writer, undoubtedly.

Need advice on developing your work in progress?

Posted on March 25, 2019November 11, 2023 by Cortni Merritt, M.A. — 1 Comment

On Writing Accents: How to Write Authentic Character Voice

Blurred teenager in background, lying on back with hands casually behind head. Silver, old-fashioned radio with bent antena and cassette player in foreground. Radio can help writers capture unique voices and accents.

It's Hard to Write Accents that Sound Like Real People

One of the joys of reading is using your imagination to enhance the scene on the page. Some characters have very distinct voices; the writer gave them an accent or speech pattern that’s different than the others. Distinct voices can create their own poetry. However, if the writer has left any wiggle room for what the character might sound like—if the character sounds generic—the reader can expand in whatever direction they choose.

As a writer, if you want your reader to hear a specific, distinct accent or speech pattern in their head for a particular character, you may want to take the additional time and craft to put that voice into the character. You will want to make it obvious, so your reader is enraptured with the sounds of your characters’ voices.

Writing Tip: Listen to Local Radio, TV Ads, & News

Now, you can always start with the easy method of writing an accent: using specific dialogue tags, adverbs, and adjectives to describe the character’s speech.

“Howdy, ma’am,” he drawled with a thick Texas twang.

Let’s say you even have it written that way in your first draft. No worries. Maybe you’re not sure in the early days exactly what the character sounds like or how to write their voice. But, when you conduct your first round of creative editing and revision, you may want to replace those lines of dialogue with a voice that’s more authentic to the ear.

If you want to make your reader really hear that drawl, you’ll need to practice listening to a Texas drawl, then transcribing it phonetically.

So, go to Texas, sit somewhere in public, and practice quietly typing up the exact sounds of the people you hear talking around you.

Okay, you don’t have to go to Texas to hear Texas.

In today’s age: everything is a quick search away.

You want to hear what Texans sound like?

Look up a Texas radio station and live stream it for an hour.
Put on a country singer from Texas and go to town for an album or two.
Dig through YouTube (or iSpot.tv—see below) for TV ads from small local businesses in different cities in Texas, and settle in to take notes.

Practice spelling out the words fo-nay-tic-alee until you can hear the voice in your head and write it out consistently. The emphasis, the missing letters, the places where people pause—all are important when writing an accent.

Listening to local radio (or watching local news or commercials) is a good way to pick up on localized slang as well, or quirks of word usage in a particular group. This can be especially helpful when you’re trying to capture the sound of a group of which you’re not a member.

But do not only passively listen: you must train your fingers to write accents, as well as your ears. You must make sure that the sounds your ears hear are the words your fingers type or write.

As you listen, attempt to mimic. Pause and ask yourself the best way to authentically spell out what the person said in the exact same sounds they made when they said it.

It could end up being any number of trials before you find the spelling or language tricks that truly reflect your character(s) and allow you to write their accent, but when you get it right, you’ll know readers will hear the same voice in their head that you did in yours.

Writer Tools for Writing Accents

Radio.net

Search 60,000 radio stations worldwide for free on radio.net.

iSpot.tv

While designed for advertisers to monitor the success of different campaigns in different markets, you can browse TV commercials from many advertisers at the database on iSpot.tv.

Editing Can Enhance Voice

SRD Editing Services Beta Reading, Developmental Editing, and Line Editing Services all include comments on character voice…